My Saving Grace
by KarysDvasia
Summary: After being exposed to radiation, Amanda Barton has discovered many new inhuman abilities. But when her relationship with the famous Captain America becomes more than she ever anticipated, she also finds that she has gained another, more human, ability. Rated M for some violence, adult language, and possible sexual content later in the story.
1. Chapter 1

**I do not own The Avengers, S.H.I.E.L.D. or any of their affiliates. I only own my original character and my original plot. **

* * *

"Barton, Fury has been trying to get you to his office for twenty minutes. He's not happy with waiting." Natasha Romanoff approached me from across the lab, looking concerned. "He said it was very important."

"Yeah, no earpiece in the lab. Oops." I shrugged, stripping off my lab coat and hanging it by the door before crossing the large hovercraft that was currently home.

I can't lie and say I wasn't a bit aggravated that Fury had called me from my research.

A little more than a month ago, I had been exposed to some strange radiation when Earth was invaded by aliens sent by Loki, some dead beat from Asgard. Since exposure, I had learned that I had many new… abilities. I was much faster than I used to be, with catlike reflexes. I had gained more strength, though not quite super human. Oh, and I could become invisible if the need arose. I had been studying my new genetic make up trying to see if the radiation was going to affect my life span or any other aspect of my life. So far my efforts had come up empty.

"You wanted to see me, sir?" I asked, falsely polite as I entered the director's office and sat opposite him.

Nick Fury was a rather tall black man with only one eye. His eye patch really only served to make him more intimidating. And I knew that he saw right through my act of politeness.

"Agent, I've got a rather important mission that pertains directly to you. You'll need to leave immediately." He sighed, leaning back and crossing his arms over his chest.

"May I ask the details, sir?"

"Your brother has been compromised on his intelligence mission in Moscow. I thought it would be best to send you to fetch him. It shouldn't be a difficult task, consider it a test run for yourself of sorts. You'll have a partner of course."

"Right, so I'll round up Stark and we'll be on our way." I stated matter of factly, rising from my seat to leave.

"Not so fast." Fury interrupted, causing me to sit back down. "You won't be working with Stark. Take The Cap." He instructed.

I furrowed my eyebrows together in anger and confusion. I had always worked the best with Tony. Our personalities were just similar and we shared the same attitude towards life and work.

"With all due respect sir, Rogers will only slow me down." I objected calmly, trying to hide my indignation.

I had never really gotten along with Steve Rogers, or Captain America as he was known by the public. For all his old school chivalry, he was still a bit lost on how to talk to a proper woman. And our personalities clashed, I think he thought I was much more brash than any self respecting woman should ever be.

"Agent, while this mission shouldn't be difficult, discretion is key. Make no mistake, draw too much attention and you jeopardize the whole mission and your brother's life. And you and I both know discrete in not in Tony's vocabulary."

"Well when you put it that way." I huffed, glaring at him before rising from my chair and putting my hands on my hips. "When do I leave?"

"Half an hour. There's already a jet on deck equipped with coordinates. The Cap has already been briefed on this mission. He will meet you on the top deck."

"Thank you, sir." I replied, not quite able to hide a grumble as I turned to leave.

"Agent Barton. Wear your earpiece while you're out." Fury called after me.

As I made my way across the carrier to my temporary quarters, I was joined by Tony Stark. While he was a pompous ass, both as himself and as the infamous Iron Man, he was by far and away my favorite colleague at S.H.I.E.L.D.

"So Moscow huh?" He smirked as we stepped onto an elevator. "Better bundle up."

"How did you know?"

"Hacked security feeds." He shrugged. "I was curious as to where you were off to and why I wasn't invited. Evidently I'm not discrete enough."

"Fury's got your number, Tony." I chuckled as I opened the door to my room.

I moved to the tall cabinet in the corner of the room and began pulling out guns and securing them to  
my person.

"Hey, that one's mine!" Tony declared indignantly, reaching over my shoulder to snatch a gun.

I smacked his hand away and he yelped. Sometimes I tended to forget I hit harder than your average bear. I was still adjusting to the whole super human thing.

"Don't touch." I reprimanded as I strapped knives around my calves and slid some throwing knives into the pockets provided on the ribs of my uniform.

For a finishing touch I crossed two long blades across my back and holstered them across my breasts. Even before my exposure, I had been an extraordinary marksman and swordsman. It must have run in the family, my brother was remarkably accurate with a bow and arrow.

"Well. I suppose that's it." I sighed, running a hand through my strawberry blonde pixie cut hair and turning to face my friend sitting on the edge of my bed. "Drinks when I return?"

"You know I'm always up for it." Tony nodded, smiling.

But the smile was strained, and I could see the worry creasing his face.

"C'mon, walk me out." I demanded, moving to leave my room and deciding it was best to ignore the emotion on his face.

We emerged from the lower levels of the craft onto the top deck to see a sleek black jet waiting at the end of the runway. Captain America stood next to the jet, waiting in all his blonde haired glory.

"One of yours?" I questioned Tony of the jet, quirking an eyebrow at him.

"Yep. Just out of prototype." He nodded.

"Nice."

The tension was killing me. Things were usually so carefree and easy between us. He was my best friend.

"Be careful, kiddo." Tony commanded gruffly, pulling me to his chest in a tight hug.

"Tony, seriously. I'll be fine." I chuckled at his sudden worry.

"Just wish it was me going for your first mission and not the Star Spangled Doofus." He grumbled, pushing me away and ruffling my hair. "Now go on. Have fun."

As I approached the jet, I saluted Captain America sarcastically and then rolled my eyes when he glared at me.

"Take a joke or this is gonna be a long trip." I suggested as I settled myself into the pilot's seat.

He took the copilot's spot next to me as I began flipping switches, preparing our plane for takeoff.

"Nighthawk, you are clear for takeoff." Agent Hill's voice rang through my earpiece.

"Let's get this show on the road!" I exclaimed, pushing the throttle forward, easing the small jet down the runway.

* * *

**A/N: Cross posting this story from my Mibba account. Updates will be quick. Please review!**


	2. Chapter 2

The concrete floor trembled under my feet as I swiftly made my way down the last, unsearched hallway, kicking doors in as I went. Of course my brother would be held in the last place we looked.

The Cap was behind me, throwing people around like ragdolls as I searched for my brother.

"Ma'am. Please. We have to hurry."

I wheeled to face my "partner" and glared at him. As much as I hated to admit it, he had been quite useful on this mission. That damn shield came in handy.

"How many times do I have to tell you?! My name is Amanda Barton! Not ma'am, not miss. AMANDA!"

Done with my rant, I turned and kicked in the last door in front of me.

My brother was strapped to a chair in the middle of the dim room, his hands chained behind his back, and his chin resting on his chest. He was battered and covered in blood, but looked up when we rushed in and smiled.

"Am, bout damn time you got here!" He joked halfheartedly before coughing and spitting up some blood in the process.

"You alright, Clint?" I demanded, kneeling in front of him and examining his beaten face as the Cap set to work on freeing him.

"Yeah. Couple of busted ribs and broken fingers. Nothing major."

His voice was rough from dehydration and his face was swollen in some places. He had taken one hell of a beating.

"They got you good huh?" I chuckled, hoisting him up out of the chair and balancing him between myself and the Captain as we began our journey back to the roof of the building.

"Damn, Am. You don't take any prisoners, huh?" Clint commented quietly as we skirted around the bodies of the Russians I had taken out along the way.

"The less witnesses the better." I shrugged.

I quickly turned when I heard footsteps behind us. We were one floor away from the roof.

"Hurry up. There's people behind us." I commanded.

We began jogging but with Clint between us, we were still moving torturously slow and by the time we reached the roof access door, the men behind us were much too close for comfort.

"Go! Get the plane ready!" I ordered the Cap, shrugging out from under my brother's weight and turning to face our attackers as they began firing their guns in our direction.

I pulled two .9 Glocks from my hips and five of the seven men fell within seconds. But as the plane engines fired up from behind me, the last two of our attackers both rolled and hid behind elevated air vents. My bullets ricochet off the metal vents in vain and I heard shouting behind me.

I ignored the sound of my brother yelling at me to get in the plane and continued aiming for a clear shot at the last two men.

"Amanda! Get in this plane, NOW!"

That wasn't my brother. Forgetting just where I was, I turned to hit the Captain with some snarky comeback. Before the words could even begin to leave my mouth, there were two gunshots and I felt two sharp thuds. One in my abdomen and the other in my left shoulder.

"NO!" My brother and the Cap yelled in unison.

"Oh shit." I breathed, hissing at the pain talking caused.

I looked down at my stomach in horror and tried to stop the blood with my hand before I became lightheaded and fell to the concrete.

I heard two more gunshots and the sound of two bodies falling to the ground. But everything sounded far away, like I was underwater.

The Cap's face appeared above me, it was like I was seeing him through fog. He was talking to me but I couldn't hear what he was saying. His face was the last thing I saw before everything went black.

-Clint's POV-

I winced as the rough movement of the plane jostled my broken body.

"You sure you know how to fly this thing, man?" I called up to Steve as I knelt next to my sister's lifeless form.

"I'm figuring it out as I go." He admitted.

I cursed under my breath and felt for my sister's pulse. She was still holding in there and the bleeding seemed to be slowing down, which I thought was odd but at that point I was just counting my blessings.

We finally landed on the S.H.I.E.L.D. carrier, roughly I might add, and Steve rushed out yelling for medics. I was in no shape to rush anywhere and waited patiently for the medics to retrieve my sister and I from the plane.

"The Cap said she was shot?" One asked me as they entered the plane with two backboards. "How many times?" He demanded when I nodded the affirmative.

"Twice. Abdomen and left shoulder. But the bleeding has slowed a lot since we left." I informed him as they picked her up from the bench seat and lowered her to the backboard and strapped her down.

Three of the medics left the plane carrying her and the last turned to me after making sure they got out of the plane without jostling her still frame.

"Can you walk?" He asked.

I nodded and together we left for the sick bay.

* * *

**A/N: ****Review and I will post sooner! Please let me know what you think!**


	3. Chapter 3

"Sir, I think you should see this." Agent Hill suggested to Nick Fury.

Fury rose from the paperwork scattered on his desk and followed Hill towards the sick bay.

"How is she?" He asked, referring to Agent Amanda Barton.  
"Well that's just it, sir." Agent Hill hesitated before continuing. "She's fine, perfectly fine." She finished, gesturing through the large window they had halted in front of.

On the other side of the glass, Amanda Barton was sitting with her legs dangling over the side of a hospital bed, swinging her feet idly as a medic examined her.

"It would seem we missed something in our initial assessment." Fury muttered, furrowing his brow.

"Should I put in an order for blood work, sir?" Hill questioned.

"No. She'll take care of that for us."

-Amanda's POV-

"Amazing." Bruce muttered, focusing the lenses on the telescope.

Dr. Bruce Banner was also known as The Hulk, who was also known as The Other Guy, The Big Guy, or if it was Tony, The Jolly Green Giant. And he was currently studying a sample of my blood.

"I wonder how Xavier missed it." I mused, pricking my finger for the umpteenth time and watching the small wound slowly close over.

"Some abilities don't surface until the time of need." Bruce shrugged, stepping away from his telescope.

"Well I'd definitely call being shot clean through twice a time of need." Tony scoffed from the other side of the desk where he was trying to hack into S.H.I.E.L.D.'s confidential files again.

I ignored him and contemplated the needle I held between my fingers.

"I wonder…You don't think?..." I was speaking cryptically but Bruce knew what I was trying to say.

"I don't know if it works that way." He supplied, shaking his head.

"May I?" I asked hopefully, stepping forward, needle extended.

"The other guy says no." He said, shaking his head.

The chances of him losing control over a pin prick was slim to none but I knew he was always extra careful.

"Tony!" I drawled, walking around the desk to stand next to him.

"Ow!" He bawled when I stabbed the back of his hand with my needle.

"Oh shut up, you drama queen. Let me see it." I commanded, grabbing his hand and pulling it towards me.

I placed my palm over his bleeding skin and concentrated hard on making the bleeding stop. I felt a small pulse and quickly pulled my hand away to see the skin was whole again.

"Hm. Neat trick." Tony shrugged, turning back to hacking the system.

After messing around and pricking Tony a few more times for my own entertainment, I decided to leave the lab for the night. When I walked through the door, the Captain was leaning against the opposite wall. He looked up when the door closed behind me and stepped away from the wall.

"Can I help you?" I asked curiously.

"I…I uh…I just wanted to make sure you were alright. I went to the sick bay and you weren't there." He stammered, blushing deeply.

"Right, well. It seems I've also inherited some healing powers. So, thanks for your concern Captain but I-"

"Steve. Please, just call me Steve." He said, smiling nervously.

"Right. I suppose I could. You did call me Amanda before I was shot." I stated. "I was surprised."

"Funny. I was actually trying to prevent you being shot." He chuckled, falling into step with me as I headed to my room.

Strangely enough, I found I didn't mind that he was walking with me.

"From now on, just don't yell at me when I'm being shot at." I reprimanded jokingly.

"I have to apologize. I actually underestimated you." He said apologetically as we reached my door.

"And I you, Ca- Steve. Old habits die hard." I grinned. "Have a good night." I said, stepping through into my room.

"You too, Amanda."

-Tony's POV-

"Oh that poor, innocent man." I sighed, cradling my chin in my hand and watching through the glass door in amusement as Steve stood talking to Amanda.

"What?" Bruce questioned, looking up from his telescope.

"She'll crush him like a bug." I chuckled.

I was surprised when Steve smiled down at my friend and they turned to walk down the hall together.

"Oh yeah. He looks positively crushed." Bruce smirked, turning back to his research.

-Amanda's POV-

I checked my phone after I was done with my shower and had crawled into bed to find a text message from Tony.

'How was that moonlit walk with the Captain?'

I sighed and rolled my eyes, smiling at my friend. Tony and I would always only be friends, but he insisted on acting the part of the overly jealous schoolboy.

'My walk with STEVE was fine, thank you.'

I chuckled to myself before turning my phone on silent and rolling over, snuggling into the covers.  
If I was honest with myself, I had to admit that Steve Rogers wasn't as bad as I had originally thought. And he wasn't that hard to look at either.

I closed my eyes, ready for sleep. But behind my lids, all I could see were the smooth planes of his jaw, the side swept blonde hair, and his sapphire orbs. His classic handsomeness.

I grumbled and cursed at myself. This could not be happening.


	4. Chapter 4

"C'mon Tony, we both know you can't beat me!" I taunted from directly behind my friend.

He wheeled around and stared right through me. I inched off to his side and giggled audibly, taunting him. I ducked when he made a wild swing in my direction and quickly swept his feet out from under him with my powerful legs. As I stood up and held him down with my booted foot, I allowed myself to become visible again.

"Told ya." I smirked, peering down at him victoriously.

"You cheated!" Tony accused as I hefted him up off of the matted floor of the training room. "You used that damn voodoo shit you've got going on." He grumbled, tugging on his ruffled black t-shirt.

"I simply used my abilities to my advantage." I shrugged, pretending to brush a speck of dust from the shoulder of my blue S.H.E.I.L.D. uniform. "Any more takers?" I called to the audience Tony and I had attracted.

The onlookers all muttered excuses and took a step back. I rolled my eyes up towards the rafters, this always happened. It was getting harder and harder to find training partners.

"I'll have a go." Steve stepped forward from the back of the group with a confident grin on his face and I smiled evily, cracking my neck.

"Oh, this is going to be fun." I speculated as he rolled his massive shoulders under his t-shirt.

He took his stance, hands halfway raised, feet planted apart. We studied each other for a long, silent moment. I smirked when I found his weak spot. I rushed forward and feinted to the left and when he made to grab me, I ducked back low to the right and slid down onto the matted floor between his wide spread feet and grabbed his ankles, pulling him flat onto his back. As I was rising to my feet, I was surprised to feel his strong arms around my calves. I looked at him over my shoulder, he had turned onto his stomach and grabbed me before I could get up. He shot me a triumphant smirk and I scowled. That move usually left my opponent struggling to catch their breath long enough for me to get back on my feet. I let out a small growl of frustration and heard him chuckle from behind me.

After a few seconds of struggling, I finally kicked free and kicked his ample hands away from my legs before rolling back to my feet at the same time he did. Steve lunged for me and I easily dodged it and threw myself onto his toned back. My plan was to sling all of my weight around his neck and throw him to the mat, but he grabbed my legs before they got halfway around his frame and made to throw me to the floor. I desperately reached for something to hold myself onto him but the large expanse of his back and shoulders left me with no hand holds and the only thing I came up with was his white t-shirt. As he swung me to the mat, there was a loud rip and his shirt followed me, fluttering to the blue matted floor. The crowd let out a simultaneous chuckle at the shirt ripping but I didn't let it distract me. No way was this soldier gonna beat me.

I jumped lithely to my feet before he could get the upper hand on me. Despite my strength and speed, if he was allowed one chance at an advantage, I didn't stand a chance. I ran full tilt towards him and jumped. I perched, crouched, for half a second on top of his shoulders before pulling his large form to the floor. We landed with a thud and I straddled his stomach. I leaned closer to his face with a wicked grin on my face.

"Dead." I whispered in his ear, holding a hand to his throat as if I had a knife.

He looked up at me, surprise in his blue eyes. We were both panting and sweaty. And I was suddenly aware of just how muscled he was. His pecs were large, unyielding planes beneath my hands and I could feel myself rising and falling with the rhythm of his breathing. Somehow during our fall, his ample hands had found their way to my hips.

"Good fight, soldier." I amended, pushing myself off of him and walking away, leaving him breathless on the floor.

"So about that-" Tony began as we walked down the hall together.

"Don't." I warned.

"I'm just trying to figure out what's going on here. I thought you hated that guy?"

"I never… hated him." I muttered.

"Fine, greatly disliked then." Tony corrected himself, smirking at me.

"Look, I don't know, alright?" I admitted, stopping to face him in front of the door to my room. "He's just not as bad as I thought he was." I continued, glancing down at my boots.

"Boyfriend material?" Tony prompted.

"You know I don't date anymore." I smiled somewhat sadly as I entered my room.

"We'll see." He chuckled.

I closed my door in his face and rolled my eyes at my friend's antics. He was having way too much fun with this.

-Steve's POV-

I watched Amanda disappear from the training room with Tony at her side, as always. I stared after her for a long time, even after she was gone and the audience had dispersed. I pursed my lips thoughtfully as I bent down to retrieve my ruined shirt.

She reminded me a lot of Peggy, the way she didn't take shit from anyone, man or woman. Her honest bravery amazed me. She was almost killed protecting her brother and I. I sighed and dragged my hand down my face. As I started to my room I was scolding myself. Even though Peggy was long gone, I still felt disloyal to her for having any sort of feelings for another woman. And I was definitely feeling something for Amanda Barton.

"Oh Captain, my Captain!"

I turned to see Tony leaving Amanda's room, closing her door behind himself. He approached me with a mischievous grin on his face.

"Walk with me, grandpa." He said, reaching up to pat my shoulder.

I was slightly confused as I followed him back the way we came.

"She's a great girl, isn't she?" Tony voiced, leaning against the rail of the viewing area of the training room.

"Who?" I demanded, a bit confused.

"Amanda, of course. Who else would I be talking about?" He prompted.

"Oh. Uh… No one."

Of course he wouldn't know about Penny. No one here would.

"Why? Is there someone else?"

I hesitated, not quite sure how to answer his question.

"Not anymore." I sighed, slinging my arms over the metal railing and hanging my head.

"Then go for it. With Amanda, I mean." Tony suggested. "You're a little old for her, but she-"

"Stark, Cap. A word please." Fury said from behind us.

We both turned, a bit surprised. For a man of such stature, he could easily sneak up on people. We followed our director to his office, where Amanda was already seated. Fury motioned to the remaining wooden chairs and Tony and I took a seat on either side of our petite comrade. Amanda flashed a quick smile to both of us and I felt my cheeks heat the slightest bit. Of course Tony noticed and shot me a smirk. As Fury settled himself behind his desk, I couldn't help but wonder what Tony had been about to say before we were interrupted. Before I could dwell on it for too long though, Fury's gruff voice pulled me from my thoughts.

"How soon can the three of you be prepared to leave?"


	5. Chapter 5

Our mission had been simple enough. Agent Romanoff was able to drop us practically onto the doorstep of the warehouse complex we were invading somewhere deep in the mountains of the Middle East. Our orders were to get in, destroy the weapons housed there, and get out. But something had gone horribly wrong.

We had no idea that an army of drones would be waiting for us. Their capabilities were far beyond those that had terrorized the Stark Expo a few years previous and there had been hundreds of them.

Together, Steve, Tony and I had managed to destroy them all but we were all exhausted and now the warehouse was crumbling down around us.

"Amanda, move!"

There was an almighty groan and then a snap. Debris sprinkled my head but I kept running blindly behind Steve, Tony was somewhere behind me but I didn't have time to look behind me and check on him.

"The ceiling's gonna go!" Steve called over his shoulder as there was another rumble and I tripped over a large metal beam that was strung across the floor.

As I was pulling myself back to my feet, the structure groaned again and there was a yell from behind me. I was knocked out of the way just in time. There was a large crash and all was still as the dust settled around me.

I looked back to where I had been kneeling to see the metal rafters of the building pinning Tony to the ground.

"No!" I cried, scrambling back to him.

He had lost his mask some time ago and parts of his face were caked with blood. His suit had lost thruster power due to the extensive damage caused by the fight. The floor shook beneath me and I looked back over my shoulder. Steve had stopped when I fell and now he was frozen in place, a look of horror clouding his face.

"Do something!" I demanded.

"No, just go. The whole building's gonna collapse. You have to go now." Tony said quietly.

The beams were crushing him and he was having trouble breathing, much less talking.

"I'm not leaving you here." I whimpered, brushing his blood matted hair back form his forehead.

I looked up when there was a rumble from further back in the building and I knew we didn't have much time. I looked back to Tony's face but he had lost consciousness.

"STEVE! Please, you have to do something!"

My pleas finally persuaded him to move and he rushed over, securing his shield to his back as he went.

"If you can just lift this bottom one, the other two will lift too and I can pull him out."

Steve just nodded and squatted, grabbing the bottom most beam. He grunted and his face was strained from the huge amount of effort it took to lift the heavy metal. He finally lifted it a few inches, just far enough for me to grab Tony by the shoulders and drag him out from under the debris.

"Lets go. We have to hurry." Steve ordered after slinging Tony's limp form over one shoulder.

He grabbed my hand and pulled me along after him. I could see the door just a hundred feet ahead of us as the building gave a final creak.

-  
The beeping of the medical equipment was lulling my exhausted body to sleep when Steve knocked on the door. I jerked awake and motioned for him to come in, patting the space on the couch beside me.

We had returned to S.H.I.E.L.D. headquarters in New York City as soon as Romanoff had picked us up from the destroyed warehouse. It had been nearly three hours and I had been trying to keep myself awake since our arrival.

"How is he?"

"They said he'll be alright. Massive bruising, cracked ribs, minor internal damage and a possible concussion. He started to wake up earlier, but they drugged him for his own benefit." I sighed, rubbing my eyes. "Tony's a bit of a prima donna when it comes to pain." I tried to smile but it was more of a grimace.

"I know what it's like to lose a friend. It must be scary for you." Steve said quietly, and I was surprised to feel the warmth of his hand covering mine.

"He's my best friend." I nodded, flashing him a watery smile. "I thought I lost him back there." I admitted, taking in a shaky breath.

"So you and him. Do you… do you… uh…" Steve stammered over what he was trying to say before puffing up his cheeks in frustration.

Despite the solemn atmosphere, I couldn't help but laugh. The thought was just too hysterical to even consider.

Steve raised his eyebrows at my behavior and I cleared my throat.

"Me and Tony? No way. Just friends, always. Pepper is like, made for him." I chuckled, referring to the type A red head. "You know, he and I weren't even friends at first. He actually hated me, I think. I was sent by S.H.I.E.L.D. after the whole incident with Obidia Stain a few years ago to act as a body guard. He told me he didn't need a baby sitter."

I smiled, reminiscing on the past few years. I had never allowed myself to become so close to anyone as I had Tony. In my line of work, it just wasn't smart to have relations with anyone. People always ended up getting hurt. But Tony understood. He knew what it was like to be hated by most and loved by few. He new what it was to be a not so super hero. But anything other than friends would never work, we were too similar and we would end up at each other's throats all of the time.

"Do you have a best friend?" I asked.

Steve pulled his hand away and I immediately regretted asking. There was no way this was going to be a happy story.

"I did." He whispered, hanging his head. "Bucky was the best friend anyone could ask for. Even before the war. He was always there to protect me and I couldn't protect him when it mattered the most. If it weren't for me…" Steve's voice cracked and I was quick to comfort him.

"Hey, I'm sure it wasn't your fault." I scolded, reaching up to rub a hand across his shoulder.

He was shaking beneath my hand and I suddenly realized how much this brave man had been through. And even after all his country had taken from him, he was still willing to fight for her.

"We were obliterating all of Red Skull's hideouts, one by one. We had received intelligence that his leading scientist was going to be on a train we were to cross paths with. Me, Bucky, and one other guy zipped down to the train. He was knocked out of the train and I wasn't able to reach him in time." Steve recounted softly, twirling his thumbs around each other. "I can still remember the look on his face as he fell."

"Steve-"

"I have to go." He said suddenly, brushing my hand off of his shoulder and standing up to go.

"I'm sorry." I called before he could make it out the door.

He turned to look me in the eye and a small, sad smile was shaping his lips.

"Yeah, me too." He muttered before turning and sliding his massive frame out the door.

-Steve's POV-

I leaned over the rail of the topmost balcony of the headquarters building. I couldn't leave until Tony woke up and we had all been debriefed, but right now I'd like nothing more than to just get on my bike and go. I knew there was no use in trying to run from my past, but the wind seemed to wipe all of the painful memories right from my head. Even if only for a while. Sometimes it was worth it. Sometimes I wished that those seventy years of perpetual sleep had taken my memories with it.

I pulled out the pocket watch I always carried with me and flipped it open. I leaned on the rail, holding it out in front of me. I stared down at the black and white picture. Despite the grayscale of the photograph, I could still recall the exact color of her brunette hair, and the shade of lipstick she always applied perfectly.

As different as Peggy was from Amanda, I still couldn't help but compare the two. Even though I knew that wasn't fair to Amanda.

I sighed and looked at the picture one last time before pulling it out of the slot. It was time to let go of my past, I was never going to get it back. I let the picture flutter in the breeze for a moment before allowing it to slip through my fingers. I closed the pocket watch with a snap, slipped it into my pocket, and turned away from the rail, turning to go inside.

I stopped when I saw Amanda standing, watching me. She walked towards me and simply peered up at me when she reached me. I was suddenly aware of how blue her eyes were, of how perfectly her strawberry blonde pixie cut complemented her facial structure. I wondered just how many freckles sprinkled her slim nose and her rosy cheeks.

"Did you love her?" She asked quietly.

"I don't know. I think so." I shrugged. "I never really got the chance to find out."

She slid her arms around me and rested her cheek against my chest. She was warm, and her hair smelled like the ocean, I wondered briefly what kind of shampoo she used before wrapping my arms around her shoulders and resting my cheek on the top of her head.


	6. Chapter 6

"So that was a close call, huh?" Clint clarified once I was finished recounting my mission with Tony and Steve.

I nodded, shifting to get more comfortable on the red plastic chair I was seated in as I took a bite of my cheesy potato soup. My brother and I were currently seated in a corner of the cafeteria area located in the S.H.I.E.L.D. headquarters.

My brother and I hadn't had much chance to spend time together lately, what with attempting to rid the world of evil and all. But we had always been close. Before joining S.H.I.E.L.D. we had worked together as assassins for hire to anyone willing to pay the right price. We had been all over the world and back again many times. We were wanted with bounties on our heads in over one hundred countries but thanks to our current employer, all United States criminal charges had been dropped and both of our records had been wiped clean.

"Any idea who was behind it?"

"I think Fury has some ideas. We're still waiting to be debriefed. Tony's still in the hospital wing. And I hear he's not very happy about that." I chuckled, dipping a wheat role into my soup.

"Why don't they just let you heal him?" Clint wondered out loud after chewing thoughtfully on a bite of his own meal of meatloaf.

"I can only heal surface wounds on others. Like a cut or maybe a bullet wound if it was clear through, but I'd rather not test that theory."

"It was a good thing Cap was there, huh?" My brother prompted, and I could see that familiar teasing glint in his eyes.

"Yes, I suppose it was, wasn't it?" I nodded dismissively, ignoring his teasing.

I was too caught up on the moment I had experienced with Steve on the balcony less than two hours ago to really be worried about my brother's teasing. I could still smell the musky scent of his cologne as it intermingled with the fibers of my clothing after our lingering embrace. If my bother ever found out about that, he would never let me live it down.

But I couldn't erase the doubt of who he was thinking about as he hugged me. Was it me or was it Peggy?

I was still baffled by the fact that I even cared, that I was allowing myself to dwell on my strange actions. I hadn't allowed myself to truly care about anyone, with the exception of my brother and Tony, in so long that I felt as if that part of my brain, my heart, was no longer functioning properly. And I was still having difficulty admitting to myself that I cared about Captain Steve Rogers at all.

"You ok, sis?" Clint asked, waving a hand in front of my face. "You look like you're going to be sick."

"Yeah, I'm fine. I'm just going to go see Tony." I said quietly, standing up and taking my tray with me. "Lets go out for dinner or something this week, alright? I miss you."

I could feel my brother's worried eyes watching me as I crossed the cafeteria, dumped my tray and left. I aimlessly made my way towards the sick bay and knocked on Tony's door before walking in without waiting for a response.

"About time you came to see me." He grumbled as soon as I crossed the threshold.

I rolled my eyes and plopped down on the edge of his bed, staring down at my shoes.

"Alright. What's wrong? Come tell Uncle Tony all about it." Tony sighed, pulling me down next to him.

I laid my head on his chest and we just lay in silence for a few moments. I thought about what Steve had asked me earlier about Tony and I as I lay in my best friend's comforting arms. I was more comfortable with Tony than I had ever been with anyone, but I cared for him as a friend. It was almost like having a second brother.

"Steve asked about me and you earlier." I admitted sheepishly.

A chuckled rumbled in Tony's chest beneath my ear.

"Did he, now?" He asked, amused.

I nodded and he chuckled again.

"The old man must be jealous."

"What?"

"Come on, the guy's enamored with you. You can't tell me you haven't noticed." He said, his voice disbelieving.

"I've been a bit preoccupied with protecting the world and all that." I shrugged, finding his words hard to believe.

"Ah, yes. That does take up some time, doesn't it."

When I was silent, he sighed.

"Amanda, maybe it's time for you to let someone else in."

-

"We've found that the person responsible for the ambush was a Dr. Sean Prothmore. Stark, he was in league with the men you attacked when you took it upon yourself to destroy all of your weapons in the middle east." Director Fury informed us as we sat around the conference room. "It seems he's extracting his revenge now."

Instead of just Tony, Steve, and myself being called in for the debriefing, Fury had called in all of us. Anytime that happened, it meant it was a serious threat.

I looked up from the file in my hand and glanced at my comrades before finally settling on Steve. He was already looking at me and I felt my face heat in a blush. I quickly looked back down to my file and mentally cursed myself for blushing.

"We don't currently have any information on his whereabouts, but in the meantime you should study his file. Be on alert. We'll call you in as soon as we find anything."

The Director stood to leave and we all took that as a signal that our meeting was dismissed. I quickly stood to leave but a hand on my arm stopped me. I turned and came face to face with Dr. Banner.

"I've found something about your mutation." He said. "It's rather interesting." He admitted.

I quirked an eyebrow, encouraging him to share his findings.

"Your cells aren't aging at a normal rate. It seems that your healing factor slows your body's aging."

I nodded, but wasn't really surprised at his findings. It was similar with Steve and Wolverine, who was a member of the X-Men.

"Thank you for telling me." I smiled, turning to leave.

I left the headquarters building and crossed the parking garage to find my bike. I swung my leg over my red Ducati sport bike after settling my helmet over my head. I leaned forward and rolled my wrist, tearing off into traffic recklessly. I lived for this, for the adrenaline rush.

I quickly made my way to Stark Tower, which had very quickly been repaired after Loki's attack and which housed my apartment, along with Bruce and Steve's. I parked my bike and entered the building, making my way to my apartment.

I opened the door and slipped off my shoes, leaving them by the front door. I padded out of the entryway into the living room and looked around. Everything was as I had left it nearly a month ago. While I enjoyed my work with S.H.I.E.L.D., I was not a fan of constantly being away from home. All my life I had craved the stability of knowing I would sleep in the same bed every night. But it was the price I paid to be an agent, and I would never know another job.

"Jarvis?" I questioned, moving into the kitchen. "You there?"

"Always, Miss Barton." The electronic voice replied, ready as every to attend to my every whim.

"Put on some Louis." I requested, pulling out pots and turning the dial on the stove.

Whenever I was home, Thursdays were always spaghetti nights.

The smooth, brassy sounds of Louis Armstrong played throughout the surround sound that was installed in the apartment.

I had just started the noodles when Jarvis interrupted my music.

"You have a visitor, Miss Barton. Captain Rogers is at the door."

I felt my stomach tingle, but I ignored it.

"Let him in please, Jarvis."

I heard the door open and close and the heavy footsteps of Steve's army boots on the hardwood floors of the entryway.

"Amanda?" He called, and my stomach fluttered again.

"In the kitchen!" I yelled out, and I heard his footfalls growing louder. "Can I help you?" I asked when he stopped in the doorway of the kitchen.

He shrugged, leaning against the doorframe.

"I just wanted to apologize… for earlier." He hesitated, looking unsure of what he wanted to say. "I was out of line when I asked about you and Tony." He finally finished.

I smiled and turned back to the pot to prod at my noodles.

"You don't have to apologize." I admonished. "I was out of line to ask about… Peggy."

As much as I hated to admit it, the woman's name was like acid on my tongue.

"No, I don't think you were."

We fell into a comfortable silence for a few moments as I stirred the noodles and began preparing my homemade sauce.

"It's nice to hear music I actually recognize." Steve finally said, referring to the music playing over the sound system.

I turned my head to smile at him over my shoulder but was surprised when he was standing a mere arm's length away. I turned fully and smiled cautiously up at him.

"Steve, what-"

"You know I've never danced with a woman?" He stated as he placed a hand on my waist and took one of my small hands into his other. "I never found the right partner."

I shook my head and placed my free hand onto his shoulder. We swayed to the sultry tune and he smiled down at me.

"For someone that's never danced before, you're doing quite well, Captain Rogers."

"Thank you, ma'am. I suppose I'm just a natural." He grinned, pulling me a bit closer.

"What did I tell you about calling me ma'am?" I scolded him playfully.

"Old habits die hard." He shrugged, mocking my statement from days previous.

I smiled up at him and that now familiar tingle was back in my stomach. My heart was racing as he dipped his head lower, closer to my own. His astonishingly blue eyes flickered to my lips and then back up to my own sapphire pools as I tilted my face up towards his, but stopped when we were only inches apart. We had stopped swaying some time ago and I suddenly realized what I was allowing to happen.

I ducked my head and looked up at him through my lashes, his face bore a look of hurt and I felt ashamed.

"You should go." I said, hardly audible.

He dropped his hands away from me and turned to leave.

"Steve, I'm sorry." I called after him, my voice breaking as tears welled in my eyes.

He hesitated for a split second before continuing out of my apartment. I heard the door close behind him and just stood in the middle of my kitchen for a few minutes.

I turned to the stove and turned it off, my appetite gone.

"Jarvis, music off." I ordered quietly as I made my way to my room and fell onto my bed.

I sighed and let my face fall into my hands. A sob shook my body and for the first time in a long time, I allowed myself to cry.

* * *

**AN: Thanks for the reviews guys! Sorry I haven't posted sooner, we've been moving and between class, moving and work, it's just been hectic. Plus getting the cats and the dog settled in together has been a pain! Please review and let me know what you think!**


End file.
